Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(817): View more from Texas

Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.

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(253): View more from Washington

Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.

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(303): View more from Colorado

maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."

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(613): View more from Ontario

She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"

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(863): View more from Florida

she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich

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(601): View more from Mississippi

Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day

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(860): View more from Connecticut

How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?

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(513): View more from Ohio

Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up

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