I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
my poor anus
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
