Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
