I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
