return my video game
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize