Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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