There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
