More tranny stories later!
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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