Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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