My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
My dick has a subreddit
Randomize
