so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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