evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
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