Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
that's an acceptable place to lick
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
