I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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