Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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