Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
