I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
