we have officially lost it.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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