Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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