Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
