I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
