you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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