But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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