I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
