Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
