hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
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