fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
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