Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize