im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Everyone says I win the strip club
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
