I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
