If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
