Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
