Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
