i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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