You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
