I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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