Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Randomize
