I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
