I don't think brook has ever known best
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
