He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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