SEEEEXXX PLEASE
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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