You were right. It hurts to walk today.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
