a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Well I just put wine in my tea
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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