I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
You are the jesus of drinking
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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