I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
