What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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