Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize