Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
