omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
