it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
