Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize