if you like me you must not know who I am
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
